Dear Ruby,
Hey sweetheart, I hope you have a great Valentine’s Day! Better not have any boyfriends though!!!
You know most days I have a “sunny” disposition, but once in a great while I hit a patch of sadness. Even though I’m surrounded by people all the time and I sleep in a closet sized bathroom with another man in bunk-beds, I can feel alone like I’m a million miles from everyone.
It is natural to look to others to help you feel loved, important, worthy, or to have your feelings validated; and I have people that have never turned away from me and have helped me through this as much as possible (mom and Aunt Jodi). However, putting your trust in another person to validate you isn’t the best idea. My whole life I’ve looked to other people to fill an emptiness inside me and have been devasted at every turn.
A religious philosopher and mathematician once wrote something to the effect of “what else does this craving, this helplessness, proclaim but that there was once in man a true happiness…This he tries in vain to fill with everything around him… Though none can help, since this infinite abyss can be filled only with an infinite object; in other words, by God Himself.”
None of the things of this world: material possessions, other people, education, pridefulness, escapism, absolutely nothing fills this void. Sure, some things may provide a temporary distraction, but sooner or later you’re back where you started, usually feeling even lower.
There is a song by Zach Williams called Lookin’ for You, it sums it up very well, I can’t recall if I’ve told you already.
Ruby, we can’t be fulfilled until we experience the Lord’s transforming and unconditional love. God wants you to feel complete, but that can happen only through a relationship with Him.
Like I said at times I feel alone, but I feel joy and contentment when I seek God first, I pray for His guidance and He fills my heart.
I love you Pie.
Remember God made you special and He loves you very much!
Love,
Daddy
Letters to Ruby 